Headlines appropriate for the day the world ends


USA Today: WE'RE DEAD.

Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS.

National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN.

Inc. Magazine: 10 WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE.

Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR.

Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER.

Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE.

Microsoft's Web Site: IF YOU DON'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD
SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE.

America OnLine: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15
MINUTES.

Playboy: GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE.

Lady's Home Journal: LOSE 10 POUNDS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW
ARMAGEDDON DIET!

Source: Houston Chronicle